Maybe We’ll Know What We Meant When We’re Dead: Everyday Magic, Day 231

Yesterday was extraordinarily charged in a quirky, painful and tender way. Within several hours, I stumbled into an unexpected heartbreak, punctuated by a media interview for Poet Laureati, a bevy of criss-crossed and tangled emails about an event months away, payment processing for the event, and deep talks with two friends while bumbling around downtown Lawrence. By the time I landed home with the kids, I was feeling particularly baffled about what I’m doing in life.

But the universe seems to not just fill all voids but overwhelm bafflement with wonder. A friend called to let me know that someone who took a writing workshop with me years ago remembered that class as vital to her eventually finding her way out of severe poverty and cycles of self-destruction. She’s now in med school.

I often tell Ken that I don’t believe we can tell the value of what we’re doing and how we’re living until after we’re dead, and believe me, from the other side of this life, I hope to have a long look at what it all meant. One of the sweetnesses of life is that we can’t see the whole view while standing in the center of it. In the meantime, I’m grateful for the angels who bring us glimpses that sometimes the pebbles we drop in the water make a difference to the shore.

4 thoughts on “Maybe We’ll Know What We Meant When We’re Dead: Everyday Magic, Day 231

  1. This is especially poignant for me today, as an old friend passed just this morning. The wonder of it all, the sting, the sweetness, and the hope that we will, in fact, have sent many loving ripples out into the world that might touch another human being in an uplifting way…

  2. Thank you for reminding me of this as I finally begin to surface out of the black hole I’ve been in these last few years. Just keep moving.

  3. These touching words brought to mind a favorite quote.
    Frederick Buechner wrote, “The life I touch for good or ill will touch another life, and that in turn another, until who knows where the trembling stops or in what far place my touch will be felt.” Your presence made quite a difference in one young woman’s life and the ripples will appear and spread for some time to come. Your make a difference.

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